I'm so cranky right now. Today has just been really bad, and I want it to be over.
I got out of work this morning after being there since Thursday night and my right passenger tire was absolutely flat. AGAIN. THe same damn place that the last tire went not more than a month ago making me buy two new freakin' tires. After having a tantrum in the office, I had Nate help me get the donut on (after I hacked away at the two inches of ice sealing my trunk shut) and called to see if Sears was open so I could go over there and see what could be done about it after Tricia so graciously said she would lend me the money to fix it. Then I get in my nice warm car and turn on the wipers to get rid of excess snow and the fucking passengers side one doesn't even budge. I don't even have the patience to give it thought at this point.
Go to Sears, find out it just had a bad seal (and I could have gotten it fixed for free where I got the tire, but was so fucking tired myself that I just wanted it done so I could go home) had Tricia come pay for it for me and went home.
And then I couldn't sleep.
I tried. I swear I did. But I just couldn't. So I wake up and decide that since I'm awake and it's the weekend, I may as well go see my family in Buxton and maybe take a few pictures since my mom is complaining that she doesn't have any for her wallet. I get all dolled up and drive thrity-five minutes out there to find that NO ONE IS HOME. No one. Except my brother's chihuahua who barked at me like I was an intruder. So, great. I leave a note after hanging around for a half hour and drive back home. In the city, I realize again it's Saturday and a friend of mine who would normally be working is home so I stop there. No answer when I buzz, but some nice man lets me in. Go up to his apartment and no answer when I knock, but this bright guy never locks his door so I open and call hello but no answer. There's an open beer on the table and football on the tv, I know he's home. Instead of intruding into his home first, I go check to see if he's doing laundry, but no dice. Go back up to his apartment, say fuck it and go in and find out he's in the shower. He's a guy, so I figure how long of a shower can he take? Wait. Wait. Wait. Hmph. I have to go home at this point because my mother is stopping in after work, so I left him a silly note that he will probably be sufficiently amused by and left to come home and bitch about my day on LJ.
Where I find that my efforts to do something just nice and sweet for my lovely Adventure Thursday community by adding interests that the members listed that I thought had something to do with the whole idea of Adventure Thursday are met with the virtual equivilent of a wrinkled nose. Great. Thanks. Next time, I'll leave well enough alone. This whole paragraph is going to offend someone or at least cause them to be a little miffed, but then again the passive agressive approach seems to be the way we do things in this house anyway.
While I'm on a roll, I'm also POOR in that mismanaged money sort of way. I just can't seem to spend it the right way, and it just really sucks. Why is it so hard to save money and pay bills and do all the normal things that a working adult does? Why am I still making the transition between teenager with no responsibilities and person who works to live? GRAH!
Tomorrow is Larry's birthday, and we haven't 'spoken' in over three weeks and I would love to tell you that I'm over him and don't miss him but that's a load of bullshit. The truth is that I'm going to be nursing my broken heart for a long time, and everything that reminds me of him makes me want to cry.
I'm so frustrated and angry and upset right now. And all I wanted was to see a freakin' friendly face today or hear some good news or just anything. I don't ask for much, and if I do I'm sorry I just don't know what to do.
Just let me survive the holiday.